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MAY 20, 2016 FRIDAY Fudge it . If I can't see clearly, I can't work. If I can't work, I don't earn. My eyesight is worse: -8.00 for both eyes with astigmatism (R 1.75 & L 2.00). My new prescription eyeglasses is ₱₱ kahit net na ng 20% (PWD-cardholder discount). It will have anti-glare coating to relieve eye strain from looking at a computer screen too long. It will have to be special ordered. The frame I chose. Dropped by Verona Optical in SM Muntinlupa on our way home from Alabang for this. Their shop is on the 2nd floor beside the food court. At least it's done. We can pick up my new specs next week. MAY 23, 2016, MONDAY I can see clearly now, the rain is gone... No glare. Good. I like the case too. Magnetic closure, shaped like a Toblerone box so it's steady on a flat surface.

So, I applied and received my PWD national ID early this month from the mayor's office. It's supposed to grant 20% off on prescription meds and basic commodities like rice. But I have to present the ID card with the corresponding booklet (there are two). Three years ago, I bought a slightly pricey black nail polish (pricey for just a simple nail polish). 'Twas bought on impulse which I surprisingly don't regret now. I expected it to be dried out but it wasn't. Cool. I don't have acetone so I only painted one nail.

100 days of nice. 100 days care-free. Then Aunt Flo came back for a visit. My face hurts. My pores are huge.

Went to bed the usual time but could not fall asleep. I might have been hungry. It was like yesterday but not quite when I got up at 10 a.m. to eat. After that, I slept until 4:45 p.m. and had coffee. But yesterday turned out to be a good day. It was 32 light, easy steps to the bathroom with the rollator and someone guarding from the rear. I forgot to count steps after that. The temperature was nice yesterday. I got up to eat at 9 a.m. today when I smelled breakfast cooking. I have been looking at the clock periodically. 5:34 a.m., 7:48 a.m. I have not slept at all. I ate and then read for a while, until maybe 11 a.m. That was when my eyes felt dry. I lied down and fell asleep but a loud, "Whatever!" from outside the window woke me up with a jerk. My body felt heavy. Someone was on their cellphone talking, no, more like yelling enthusiastically. I lied awake for a while until I lost patience and asked them to please talk somewhere else, that I was trying to sleep. They did.

Late-night snack. Corned beef and orange slices for breakfast. Left-over lettuce wrap filling with fried egg makes a nom-nom meal. That is ground chicken meat. Garbage truck came so it was bye-bye to the bag of trash that occupied this space, at last. You can see my transport wheelchair and rollator over there. Hmmm... my mobility aids need dusting. This reminds me, important things like these must match the person using them. A couple of years ago, I bought a rollator to use abroad, online. Like my trusty one, it was three-wheeled and lightweight but by a different maker called Drive Medical. It looked nice but I could not squeeze the brakes properly -- it was useless to me. We tried adjusting the thing but nothing worked. Such a waste but lesson learned. If I will ever need another rollator, I will stick with Invacare. I will tell the "why we chose a transport wheelchair" story on another post. Holy Week so there was fish. We eat dinner together at the tab

Fell on my a** today. I think my left knee gave way. {myositis} I will feel the brunt of this tomorrow. On to nicer things then. From our Christmas eve dinner... that's pininyahang manok up top ...to a pretty Christmas tree. green, white, silver and lights And my Christmas lunch. Christmas lunch Fresh lumpia, menudo, lengua estofado, embutido and bakareta. They cooked the bakareta on a low fire for three hours! It was melt-in-your-mouth tender.

10/10/14 Friday chicken + salad dinner 10/11/14 Saturday We took a video of me playing the piano. It looked like I was giving the finger when I played keys on three scales for a measure. Embarrassing. I deleted it. {myositis}

10/1/14 It's really hot here, isn't it? Especially at noon and midnight (yes, midnight). Ayayay! I felt sick on Sept. 28, around 2.30 a.m. Sudden nausea. I stopped working and went to bed with a barf bag. I did not vomit. Today, my stomach acted up. It woke me up. Rumble... nothing. Rumble... nothing. I thought that was it, I was fine. Then, rumble! Toilet! What's happening?! Nausea, diarrhea. Could be stress... or the fish oil supplement I started on Sept. 27? I don't know.

2/5/14 Bagong taon ang dami kong reklamo. Nag-f-flare ba myositis ko o mataas lang upuan ko? O baka naman kasi inikot ko kama ko? O baka tira to nung bumagsak kanang puwet ko sa upuan nung bagong taon? Siguro lampas isang linggo na nung pagtayo ko pagtapos maligo eh may nangyari sa right hip ko, parang may naipit na ugat o ewan, basta di ako makatayo sa kanang tuhod at paa kasi bumibigay, di ko sila maramdaman, tapos sumasakit sa balakang pang pinipilit ko. Buti naman at handa ang kasama ko kaya di ako natumba, pareho kaming nagtaka talaga. Bumalik naman ang pakiramdam sa kanang binti kinagabihan pero tila may nangyari nga, may nararamdaman akong nagbago, di siya maganda. Kailangan ko pa tuloy na may bantay simula nun pag naglalakad kasi alanganin, nakakatakot. Pati ba naman lakad mawawala pa? Wag naman po. Nagkaka-ewan naman talaga ako, bad days kung baga. Sobrang 20 years nato, alam ko na yun. Usually, pag may ganun, pagkapahinga at iwas stress ng ilang araw, bumabalik naman na

walking out to the rollator a few steps away, holding the door frame for support {this room is narrow; carer is standing by} i miscalculate a step. left foot steps forward but hits the floor too soon. the sudden halt before full weight is transferred forces the right the hip out {ouch, the joint!}. waist bends, torso falls forward, bum falls back on its way - hard - to the floor. then, carer catches an arm and knees finally give way so i land sat on a nearby seat. thank you! right hip hurt for days. last week's pancit and lechon paksiw --

Recent blood test results were normal apart from being slightly hypo on fasting blood sugar (that I was made to believe was not a cause for concern). The point is lipid profile was all good so we called it in to ask if it was ok to reduce the statin (been on 20mg od since March) but people were distracted on the phone so we didn't get straight answers. Now, me thinks I'll be on it for a very long time. Poor kidneys.

you'd think after years of taking the same prescription, you'd get used to it with little to no side-effects. surprisingly, for the first time in many moons, i'm feeling yucky tonight. i think it's from the meds but it could be something else.* i'll just assume it's the meds, for now. i'm going to bed. *Update ~ Yup, it's not the meds. Hello, Miss Flo.

might not be able to play a guitar anymore. it is sad. {myositis}

the previous week's meals were nice... pot roast, tuna pesto spread on bread and savory pork caldereta with lots of cheese. i wish i took pictures. i am feeling yucky today. could be the weather: hot then cold then hot = headache, gloom. could be effects from last night's meds. could be the weather {yes, this again}: hot=sweaty and cold=dry; either makes walking and other ADLs difficult. my adage in times like these is "one step forward, two steps back" so i know that means to take it easy and stop testing myself today and also, to stop worrying. actually, that's more of a warning.{myositis}

grout on my mind i think i gained weight {which could be a good thing at the moment - as long as it's not too much} so i'll visit the old scale later to see where i'm at. but what's REALLY bothering me lately is this heaviness on my chest and shoulders since i started scrubbing old grout stains. i hope this is just my chest and shoulder muscles working ok, and not a myositis flare or as someone we know would call it a leak . anyway, for me, that means to stop obsessing about grout for now and see how i am in the next day or two. food supplement to try normally, this costs 1,200 pesos {very steep for a box with 30 caps} but someone gave me a box as a freebie 'cause they wanted me to try it - someone said someone claimed their kid took this quite well; and it's free so thanks. the bfad permit number on the pamphlet tells me it should be harmless; i guess i'll find out soon i hope so.

i'm confused. If someone asks, which is the better/simplest answer to mean an adult who's had myositis since she was a kid? * juvenile-onset myositis ; childhood-onset myositis* Last major flare up was 10 years ago. Second to the last major one was at time of diagnosis (but I had symptoms years before the diagnosis so I couldn't remember exactly when it started). Hopefully, i haven't given away my age, tee-hee! Notably, it's moving past the coincidental 10-years-in-between-terrible-flare-ups period and... nothing. I feel like celebrating. I braced myself, been extra careful too... Still am. Shouldn't get too excited. Last time i checked it's still an idiot... Err, i mean, it's 'idiopathic.' Small consolation is that most probably, I wouldn't die because of it, just with it. Right, woop-dee-doo! *updated 15-Feb-2013